The daily remindersthat there was still this anomaly there, that my body did not whollyreflect who I deeply felt myself to be, began to grate: getting...dressedin the morning and having to, well, "tuck" things out of the way; goingto the bathroom; wearing a bathing suit and worrying that something mightnot look "quite right"; being intimate with my partner. All of thesethings began to function as unwelcome cues that things were not as theyshould be.The tipping point came a couple of summers ago.. " "This is embarrassing. Okay, you promise not to say anything?" I gave her my promise and my stomach began to turn. "Last Saturday I partied with him and his friends, went back to his place and had sex with him and his best friend at the same time. I kinda liked it, but I don't want to see him again. If they tell their friends I will look like a horrible person." I couldn't believe I ever loved that slut. Shame on me. I didn't learn a thing from my four years of college. I gave her a hug and. When do you want me there?"Two days later, my stomach was in a knot like a teenager on his first date. Juanita, my maid, had told me I was crazy and I probably was a little off-center, but I wanted everything to be perfect. Dinner was simple: cold lobster and shrimp salad with Louie sauce, freshly made bread and real butter, thirty-dollar-a-bottle chardonnay, soft music.I told her to dress casually. I wore a pair of loose nylon shorts, a white tee-shirt outside my shorts, and Docksiders with no. "I want it so bad," she grunted as she fucked herself.She turned her head as she masturbated and imagined her husband sitting in a chair next to the bed, rubbing his hardening cock. She opened her mouth, inviting him to shove it down her throat. She wanted to be spit-roasted for the first time ever.She snapped out of her fantasy as she began to feel her pending orgasm grow in intensity. Her free hand manipulated her clit as she pushed the fake cock in and out of her with growing.
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